Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
There is a full size piano in the middle of our road. Please tell me you had nothing to do with this.
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
I used my yoga mat as a door stop so he couldn't come into my room when i was sleeping last night. Drunk engineering at its finest
He snapchated me a photo of his penis with the caption "it needs a home".
its 3am and I'm taking a bubble bath, this is what taking a day off work at 30 looks like
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
I either forgot underwear this morning or lost them at work and I seriously don't know which.
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
Randomize
