He just knocked over the beer pong table... I haven't seen so much fail in one room since I watched "Mall Cop" with my grandma
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
Just bought plan B with a coupon. Told the pharmacist I like to keep it classy.
Every day you talk to me ... I literally love you more..
After skinny dipping in your pond, I think me and tequila have added a whole new dynamic to our relationship.
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
Just saw a guy with two baby turtles sneaking into the building
You screamed at oncoming traffic , "five dollars to punch this guy in taint!".
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
So, Cheetos don't microwave great.
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
I did this clutch move yesterday at the bar where I grabbed a plastic cup for water and discreetly threw up in it while walking around and then tossed it. It was my best boot and rally ever
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
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