I can't watch pbs sober anymore
You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
So the waitress at the Chinese Buffet totally just said "Adios" to a Hispanic couple. There's something you don't see every day.
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
Why did I wake up holding food tongs?
I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized...
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
Ok so I didn't mean for his first impression of me to be lying face down on his roommates bedrooms floor throwing up my jäger but it happened. Atleast my ass looked good in those jeans. Think I still have a shot?
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
Because I'm currently dying, lacking waffles, and vaguely convinced I'm an eagle
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
You’re like one of those doomsday preppers, but for your vagina
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
Randomize
