I think I'm maturing; i was gonna watch porn and then take a nap but i motivated myself to put my laundry in first.
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
Hippo gnu deer
So my grandma sent me a valentines day present of waterproof mascara, tissues, and chocolate. Way to reinforce that I'll be single and depressed on valentines day. Thanks grandma.
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
High as shit. I just described caramel syrup on crackers to my mom for 15 minutes...
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
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