David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
I wasted some perfectly good semen on her
I tried carrying you from the bathroom to your bed and you begged me to bring the toilet too
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
I got slapped by a drag queen and bitten on the arm by either a random girl or a weird mouth shaped dog. Tough to tell without seeing the teeth
No it'll be my boobs and the luge part will be from my nipples. Everyone will be sucking beer from my perfectly sculpted and partially melted tits.
I just lifted up my shirt to scratch my stomach n a Dorito flew out of my pullover n it legit scared me when it hit me.
I swear to god....if you can give yourself a brazilian you can take a fucking bullet
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