Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
Found out it was only pneumonia. We celebrated hydrocodone cough syrup. Two long island ice teas at lunch and the random white powder we found in her purse. Mother of the year award.
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
I ate so much cake that I can't even enjoy a blowjob
That's the most first world problem I've ever heard in my life.
We almost drove away from the bar with a British stranger in our trunk...
hey, just so we're clear, next time we go swimming drunk at my house, we have to use the floating chairs instead of my mattress. i'm not sure how to get it out of the pool.
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
Randomize
