You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
Ah I wish I was there to nurse you then clean up your piss-filled water bottles
for some reason the bedside piss missed the water bottle today
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
It was the gentlest way I could hit on a girl who just got hit by a car
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
He tried to say "god bless your heart" to the stripper but it came out "god bless your pussy"
You can't start the super bowl without starting a kitchen fire making cole slaw. Its unamerican.
I don't even want to know
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
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