I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
She wouldn't stop saying her own name. Like a damn pokemon.
We found your brother, passed out, floating in our pool, with a bottle, on a blow up mattress. How did he mange to walk 2 blocks and get into our backyard?
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
fuck sobriety. I want to wake up tomorrow in a park or some shit.
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
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