I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
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Woke up with my foot jammed into a VCR
Yeah, I think they knew. I smelled like that telltale combination of strippers and Easter.
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
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Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
So I put a beer on your bed and jumped on th3 other side of the bed like in the commercials. You my good sir, owe me a budweiser that your bed drank.
In all honesty the person most likely to secretly slip me drugs would be ... Me
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
My dad's girlfriend is driving through the snow to bring me my purple haze. If he doesn't wife her up, we have a bigger issue on our hands.
Hey you're my best friend, I'm sorry I picked my vagina over my heart last night.