ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
and she was petting her beer can
We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
We're lucky we aren't prostitutes by now. Whats the etiquette for returning a pair of heels with blood on them?
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
i need to buy one of the child leashes to wear at mardi gras or else im never making it out alive
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
We ate a mysterious delivered pizza which no one ordered and then the wii wouldn't work so 20 of us watched porn on two laptops. Drunk took the awkward away.
Well my door is unlocked for you, I'll be in the bathtub drinking a pre-mixed bottle of margarita until I forget the degree to which my life sucks.
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
You shouldn't have to. I think you should bust into work like "pay homage to my magical vagina!"
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
i woke up inside a girl that i promised i would take on a date to Chili's
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.