if you like me you must not know who I am
Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
You know you're deprived when the only thing you taste while chewing gum is the 2 grams of sugar alcohol.
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
Hey have you ever thought about fishing cause I'd like to go fishing but don't know anyone that fishes and I'm gonna cry because. FISHING
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
Nothing says "I'm sorry for shitting in your bed" like an Olive Garden gift card
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
Randomize
