She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
Before I left he asked me if I could submit my panties for the frat house undergarment chandelier. I said yes
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
It was insane. I was drunk for 11 consecutive hours. I woke up covered in almonds and there were footprints all over my shirt
Say hello to your nephew Sir Isaac Meriwether van Catsworth
I'm going to have to start taking your phone after ten. That's when all the cat pictures come
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
You bring me burritos. Of course I text you during sex
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
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