I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
i just realized the only form of arm exercise i get is holding my arms up in the stand up tanning booth
you're just mad cause i madeout with you while having a mouth full of chewed pretzels
Oh boy...do i want the 'something you can tell your mom in 10 yrs' version or the 'Im gonna call you a whore but be proud' version?
I'm going to try to be reasonable tonight and keep my drink count out of double digits
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
whose ass print is on the piano?
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
Tomorrow after you go to the library to look up gay porn, I'm going to come to your apartment to paint a nude portrait of you. Get pumped, plopernickle.
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
I'll just bring the big suitcase this trip so I don't have to play wine bottle tetris again.
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
Randomize
