Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon
mmm whisky
reminds me of losing my job
just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
Most likely. calling 911 isnt usually something i do the first time i hang out w. someone, but hey. its a good story now.
Dude, I need a lifestyle change. I'm to old to be making out with chicks in foam parties, letting older chicks get all excited because I let them put their hands up my shirt, and running around doing scavenger hunts with 18 yr old chicks.
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
I will give you the couch, a small portion of the fridge, and plenty of beer.
Got my future figured out. I'm oddly comforted. Thanks, bro.
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
Best thing I ever did was get a dog. She's like a living trip alarm to warn me of visitors while I'm masturbating.
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
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