just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
Do you know who the random guy who just walked in to kiss me goodnight is?
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment
I made out with an Italian cab driver. Not cool. Help. Good news he will drive us anywhere we want to go as long as you cook food?!?!?! I want to melt into the pavement.
Hooker in the library. I repeat, we have a hooker in the library. This is not a drill.
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
I just used "et al" in a sext. I thought you'd be proud
I'm feeding a baby and swiping on tinder...what has my life come to?!?!
Like, my vagina is jet-lagged.
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
