My first STD was from a foam party
What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
I'm waiting for your stupid pizza and this 400 lb drunk man is behind me singing the acapella version of Elevation by U2
Why is there a waffle in the knife drawer?
The real question is why are there knives in the waffle drawer.
You’re like one of those doomsday preppers, but for your vagina
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
Randomize
