after a month anything with tits is on the radar
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
i cant text you anymore tonight, God gave me two hands for two cups
I'm sad your dog died... Her name is my stripper name.
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
I'm offering you baseball tickets and my vagina, isn't that enough?
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
So I fucked him. Then I MC Hammer'd to the bathroom, where I did the robot in celebration of my accomplishment. And then I spent 10 mins fixing my toilet. But YOLO.
OMFG "ASS" JUST STARTED PLAYING ON MY PHONE VIA PANDORA AS IM IN THE CAR WITH A CONGRESSMAN FUCKKKK
First things first, I always get more drunk than the birthday girl. Like, who's idea was it to sing karaoke? I killed it.
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
I have vodka, fruit gushers, and health insurance. Let's party.
Randomize
