Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
frozen peaches as icecubes. vodka Sundays just got wayyyy better
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
I'm sick of being broke. I had vicodin and frosting for lunch.
I woke up with cheeseburger in my mouth and a deep sense of accomplishment.
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Now I have the walk of shame to give the receptionist the bathroom key back, I've had it for 20 minutes. I should just smile and wink. She knows what went down.
do you remember yelling out "insecurity makes my pussy dry!" unnecessarily loud at the bar?
We were literally making dick jokes with his dick out
That’s the level of friends with benefits I aspire to achieve
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
Pandora played an ad for a free trial for an abortion pill if you’ve had unprotected sex in the last 2-3 days and then Lucky came on... I literally am dying laughing
Sorry I can't pick up... thought process is fine but too stoned to form words.
Randomize