Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
To the person who put the glitter on my ceiling fan...fuck you
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
I never thought it would be so hard to find a power hour partner at 2 on a Wednesday
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
We've been together for 10 months. These next 2 may be a deal breaker. He has not met the summertime version of me that is so hungover today that I cancelled a meeting with my boss right after she sent me an appreciation note saying I have great work ethic. I have her fooled.
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