Swine flu. Run for my life!
I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
I have more bruises, scratches, and overall soreness from my birthday weekend than my car accident.
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I puked right in front of him after winning beer olympics and he still hooked up with me. My life is so easy.
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
I woke up tied to my bed while she was in the corner staring at me while eating cereal. Interesting night!
But it's ok cause then I turned my tequila blanket into a tequila comforter and I felt no pain
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I almost put an adult beverage in my sippy cup for the beach but realized the next step would be rehab.
No the next step is being buzzed at the beach. I would've.
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
"I'm a professor to university students" I say as I realize I have a nipple piercing that I have no memory of getting
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
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