just realized the sink is the perfect height to piss into never cleaning the toilet again
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
I forgot it was 4/20. that COMPLETELY explains the 7/11. i was like "that's a lot of white dudes... and they're really into snacking."
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
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You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
If I take diet pills with my edibles I'll be a perfect person
What people don't tell you about near death experiences is they give you a full on chub
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These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
My uber driver just told me I smell like fun...still drunk at 7 am
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
My brother is coming home and he is bringing a whole bunch of friends with him. I am making him a cake. What should i put on it?
"Open for business" or "I have condoms" would probably work
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
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