he asked me what things i liked that he did in bed, and i told him all the things i hated so he would use it on that new bitch and she wouldnt hook up with him anymore.
you for real need to get over him dude
guys don't fucking realize that the only place girl like their faces jizzed on is in PORN, and that "squirting" is piss. JUST FUCKING PISS.
Haha, bad night?
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
We just fucked in the park on a bench and a guy with a dog walked past us and the dog walked right up to us while the guy stared at his phone.
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
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