I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
Watching her eat just hurts me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Only he would come to a strip club and talk about an internship with Walt Disney during a lap dance.
Did you put pizza in my boxers last night?
I left you 4 hours ago. Have you been walking around with shit in your pants all day?
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
I don't get it. If he broke into Taco Bell at 2 am, then why couldn't he have brought me home a fucking taco???
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
so it turns out that when you ride the subway drunk at 5 am you wake up with a sailor in your bed
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
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