oh, also, we're locked out of the house and we're going to have to take shelter with the hot, poss single, dad next door. i hope this turns into a porno
Almost ran you over in the parking lot. You look good
I never want to see another naked old woman again.
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
there was a trapeze. enough said
if you hear someone banging on your door early in the morning, it's me with some breakfast burritos, so don't be alarmed
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
The instructions say refer to specific course material, but I'm in no mood to reopen this awful book that caused me so many lost hours of drinking.
Yeah FUCK THAT NOISE
I just had the weirdest moment. Made eye contact at the bar with a girl who has seen my vagina.
i woke up on someones kitchen floor, and i used the gps in my phone to find my way home. im really glad you forgot about me.
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
Gameplan: If the cops show up, find a potted plant to hide behind... It's worked before!
Randomize
