The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
they need to invent a card that reads "thanks for all those boners you gave me that you did NOTHING about"
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
The amount of precision it takes to urinate into a 2 liter bottle while hammered is undeniably difficult.
I'd apply for another job, but "staring out windows crying" is not a hot qualification right now.
I had an epiphany. If a dude dressed up as Batman to ask me out, I'd prolly marry him.
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
This chick just walked by and pet my beard. Don't know, never talked to her. She just walked by and pet my beard.
Marry her
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
Randomize
