Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
I'm standing outside of the bar watching homeless men teach a kid how to pee of the sidewalk.
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
Hey beautiful no judgement but why is there a bucket of KFC chicken in the bathtub??
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
Shut up. The only friend I need in life is Jim Beam because life is meaningless.
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
Theres a handprint of sauce on my fridge, one on my face, and a trail of it leading to my bedroom, and sauce all in my bed, and I have no idea what the fuck i ate.
He calculated like a serious conversion in his head the other day and got a crazy number and I was like damn that’s hot please proceed to take your clothes off.
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
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