Just joined the godiva rewards club. Who's the fat friend now.
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
It was like I was playing the clarinet on his penis. And I just kept saying I'm sorry.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
Ok so I didn't mean for his first impression of me to be lying face down on his roommates bedrooms floor throwing up my jäger but it happened. Atleast my ass looked good in those jeans. Think I still have a shot?
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
Have you ever had to act sober and talk to an authority figure in a coconut bra? Because it is just as degrading as you would imagine.
That falls under the "unwelcome penises" category. Also that's definitely a sentence I never thought I would say
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
Randomize
