Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
And then I chipped his tooth because I got too into it. Helloo, single life.
I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im holding a competition......who saw me last, and who knows how my nose got bruised? you earn points for answering either question. and for bringing me water.
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
No room in fridge, chilling wine in snow. Do NOT let the dog pee on it.
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
I wonder if i could put a dildo on my bike seat to encourage me to exercise.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
First Thanksgiving as a grown up: My step dad had to take my brother (who still smells like booze) and I both to our cars this morning, apparently we were at the same bars (same stamps), & I think I broke my elbow. Im thankful to be alive & not incarcerated.
I think mom knows I'm drunk I put a full blown balloon in the fridge.
Your niece just basically announced she's a whore on FB so you should feel pretty good about officiating that wedding next month.
There should be a promo code on the Papa Johns website for "I have no moneys but if you send a cute delivery guy I will pay him in blow jobs."
My bank account got hacked so he showed up with a 6 pack wearing a superman cape to cheer me up and you question why I love him?
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
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