sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
I'm going to make an art book filled with pics of me peeing in every bar bathroom I've ever been in. Dedicating it to you. You're welcome.
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
Randomize