She left me with blue balls so I jerked off on her french toast in the morning.
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
The two guys from next door helped him do a backflip. The ended up throwing him halfway through a ceiling tile. Don't worry, we fixed it with duct tape.
Just caused a nice traffic jam while trying to park at Costco. Too high to drive.
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
I picked up a guy that night wearing a onesie. I kicked Xmas' ass
First you say "it can't get any worse" and the next thing you know you've shat yourself on Christmas Eve.
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
Randomize
