I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
I had a dream last night, there was a gumball machine that was filled with Oxycontin. I would try to get some but got vitamins instead. I was so frustrated!! woke up angry.
You were hopping up and down because you wanted only his strongest sperms to make it to the egg.
Darwin at his finest.
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
She sprinted out of the bathroom and ran all the way into the middle of the street. Five minutes later she came back with a banana nut muffin. She's that kind of drunk.
Just filled the brita up in the bathtub because we couldn't get it into the sink.
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
The trees feel like magic. Come fly to taco bell with me.
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
The cops came, and I made friends with him. He wants me to babysit his kids.
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
Randomize
