how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
The only thing worse than cracking my rib on a slip and slide was having the doctors laugh when they found out in my medical history that I did this exact same thing last summer.
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
I just told my sister I love her. I'm in no condition to drive.
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
What kind of paramedic is he, some dude is dying back there and he's trying to get laid
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
Getting food poisoning after eating at work was the cherry on top of my "Welcome back to real life" sundae.
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
Bahahaha I just turned on the fan in front of the elliptical to avoid puking//try to get some baywatch hair going and the guy next to me thanked me because he was "getting nauseas from the smell of stale sweat and tequila"
Randomize
