just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
I have been standing totally still for the past 6 minutes because I was convinced my foot was tied to the ground. It turns out it was a string of hair strewn across my foot
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my feelings for you are synonymous with those of a grizzly bear and salmon. i don't want to nom on you; but i need you to survive
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
DOMA is dead. I'm definitely going to be the last of our friends to get married now.
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
I have to choose between charging my phone or my vibrator. This is bullshit.
Omg my orgasm just made the fucking sun come out. Clearly my libido controls the weather now.
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
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