Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
Whenever he makes me dinner its always mini things.. cheeseburgers, corndogs.. is he preparing me for something?
i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
yeah he couldn't walk in a straight line and started throwing up and told the cop he just has an astigmatism
I'm crying, drinking alone and applying for jobs tonight. I figure the alcohol will lower my job standards.
She wants to practice her harmonica skills on my penis
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
Only he would come to a strip club and talk about an internship with Walt Disney during a lap dance.
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
I asked her why she was drunkenly masturbating to Iron Man and all she replied was "Robert Downey Jr". As far as excuses go, that seemed pretty legit.
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
Randomize
