Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
Yes I was being legit. That's the only plant I want in my house. A growing penis.
I pretty much have hash tequila and gelato for dinner every night
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
Taco Bell drive through. Chick got out of the car in front of us and threw up on the hood of my car!
Not okay.
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
Just walked past the field playing Jesus music with a fanny pack full of condoms and beer. Happy Sunday.
Remind me to tell you the story of the fuzzy condom
You know your life has gone downhill when someone has to preface your night with "don't get locked in a porta potty"
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
Randomize
