Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
There are dudes in kilts outside my window practicing fire breathing with cheap vodka and a modified grill lighter. I thought you should know.
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
Captain Morgan didnt let me down when i stand up it feels like the world is trying to hand me rainbows.
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
Why am I sticky / covered in baby Tylonel?
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
He wore the same cologne as my orthodontist so all I could think about was how I hadn't worn my retainer in months
I managed all three standard threesome configurations a female-bodied person can achieve in just under nine years. I want to high-five everyone involved, but I've lost touch with a couple of them
I'm not gonna swipe right, he has better hair than me. Just no.
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
Randomize
