No, you can still breathe under the balls.
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
Did you wake up with "jello shots" stamped on your hand too?
That was the most comfortable bag of doritos I have ever slept on!
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
Plus i lost a button on my shirt and we got free drinks all night. Sorry I'm not sorry.
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
This Christmas I would like to thank Jesus for cocaine.
I just realized that you're going to be drunk for daylight savings time again. Godspeed.
Ran up to the dollar store to get batteries for my vibrator. Happy Valentines Day!
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
Went to bed in my room fully clothed, woke up naked in the kitchen with the dog looking unamused.
I got a free corona t-shirt and all I had to do was drink a beer. This needs to be a more widely accepted form of currency.
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