Don't make out with my wife yet
Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
The gay bar tender told me I looked like Prince William. And that I needed my balls licked.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
It'll be a pair of asscheeks that light up when they're summoned.
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
Randomize
