Kareoke will never be a sober sport
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
you passed out on the bathroom floor with the door locked. we had to break in and no one was sober enough to move you so they just threw a towel on you and stepped over you
I told him I don't date guys unless they play a musical instrument. So, he's here and he brought a kazoo.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Not going out tonight. And so the 25 day drinking streak ends....
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
It's kind of hard to say bye to you when you fall asleep on the bar..
i put that paper plate back in your cabinet because i ate all the ketchup off and you can't even tell. you're welcome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
Day drinking straight vodka out of a Mountain Dew can being towed behind a kayak on a raft. And no, there is no time difference, it really is 10 am.
Just test drove the kilt for Justin's wedding. NEVER. WEARING. PANTS. AGAIN.
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
In hindsight, maybe rearranging his living room because he has OCD while he was out wasnt the greatest idea. Though it'll keep him busy for HOURS
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