He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
i have the juiciest gold medal in my pants
Get out of your relationship and into my pants.
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
I just discovered I can sober up while teaching class
I don't know what to say to that. All I know is my vagina is trying to jump through the phone.
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
I look excited, but its just a facade.
This is the nicest bathroom I've ever been drunk in. The urinal is gold.
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
Randomize
