I almost hooked up with this girl last night. she had a tattoo of a cardinal next to her cooter. said it reminded her of her grandpa
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
tonight i'm making a christmas tree shaped shot pyramid
Listen, Pinot Grigio got me pregnant. It can get you a boyfriend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There are 3 guys sitting in the elevator in lawn chairs wearing sunglasses and holding beers. the hallway rugs are stuffed in a trash can. i've never been so glad to be sober.
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
I'm gonna be a few minutes late, some asshole just fell off the ferry so we had to stop.
A client gave me a bottle of vodka today. And he was hot with a beard. It's like he knows my soul.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
Sent him a nude and I forgot to crop out the Jesus picture in the background. The Catholic guilt is too real.
You're the only guy I know who could convince a lady at the pharmacy to trade you her pain pills for your antibiotics.
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
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