i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
Dude just texted me asking if I could drive 45 mins for a quickie dude use your hand
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
I'm pretty sure I just came a kidney stone..
I woke up only wearing a Breaking Bad "Los Pollos Hermanos" apron he got from Loot Crate next to a 3 empty bottles of Zima,Jolly Ranchers, and a jar of coconut oil. Fernet is one hell of a party starter
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
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