your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
He left his umbrella behind in my bed to 'keep me company', then stole my front door key before he went to work
You texted me "Americans are sad" and "chicken coop disaster" without any further explanation.
My goal of the day is to not shit myself. That's it. Setting the bar real low
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
that's like... drinking popov and saying its the worlds best vodka. you gotta try some others first. THERE SHOULD BE A MISS AMERICA PAGEANT. but like, mr penis. and they can do tricks and make unintelligent remarks and wear sparkly condoms.
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
Well it was tamer than the 4th of july when I blew that guy I met walking home from the fireworks
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
I woke up with his condom in my mouth. I actually use them now you should be proud of me.
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
I keep worrying she's gonna have a repeat of the time the ceiling fan was talking in Chinese
Randomize
