I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
I just five second ruled a donut I dropped at starbucks, everyones staring
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
I settled on "Merry Christmas! Btw you may have chlamydia". I thought a nice holiday greeting would soften the blow
Nothing quite like the "I had sex you a month ago and now we're stopped at the same 4 way" wave
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
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