i want two things in life...emily to stop talking and a block of cheese.
it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
I just found a pubic hair on my dick that wasn't mine.
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
Im not coming back to that place until im drunk. If I walk in there sober Ill start screaming uncontrollably. Not words, just sounds.
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
My penis definitely considers my Captain Cock costume a success
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
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