i just made my gag reflex go away.
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
I don't know who he was, where he came from, or where he went, but he just handed me a bowl of mac and cheese and left. It was good too.
I've never seen so many strippers at a funeral...
You'd be proud of me. They tried to give me bread to sober up, but I told them no, im on a diet.
The less money I spend on drugs, the happier my mom will be.
I asked the full emergency room who else was there because of homecoming and every single person raised their hand
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
just said thank you to the lady who gave me a body search at the airport
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
You know when you're a kid and you play at the pool until you passed out? It was like that except instead of playing it was sex.
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
Randomize
