it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
he asked me to help him wrap his girlfriends birthday presents. Dont worry we fucked right after.
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
i pretended i was deaf and got a girl to come home with me
And by "got a tattoo" i mean i got a tattoo in the dorm bathrooms with a guy using his cousin's tattoo gun.
We can add pilot to the list of people who's lives I've changed...with my penis.
I blacked out at the bar, and blcked in getting a handjob on a roller coaster. Sober me is jealous of drunk me.
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
Didn't know where your dishes went. Put em in the bathtub. They're stacked taller than you. It's like modern art.
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
Hahah I’ve never had someone stop me mid-coitus to tell me how amazing I am. Def ego boost.
I was running because his wife invited me to join them on their kinky Vegas weekend. Crossing state lines is too much commitment for me.
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
Randomize
