i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
We ate a mysterious delivered pizza which no one ordered and then the wii wouldn't work so 20 of us watched porn on two laptops. Drunk took the awkward away.
Are you sure you didn't shit in my back yard?
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
I swear man, you fly across the country to give a boy your virginity and he suddenly thinks you like him
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
Dude I swear I'm scooping human shit out of the litter boxes. What the fuck happened last night?
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
dude it was our first time and her hair caught on fire from the candles on the nightstand
There is no way that actually happened!
the smell of burnt hair covered up the sweaty sex smell.
Randomize
