At least make sure they are 18
Why
she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
Sorry I didn't text you for coffee this morning...bad life decision Saturday sorta rolled into Monday...
First and foremost she's my friend, but she's also a mistake I make when I'm drunk
So I found where you barfed in my house. Just wanted to let you know that my cat barfed on the kitchen floor in a show of solidarity
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
Woke up with a text saying "when I get to see them titties again lil ma??" With 8 beads around my neck & an empty bottle of vodka in my arms.
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
She tried to subtly measure me, but I noticed. She told me I barely made the cut otherwise there would have been just a handshake as a parting gift.
all we have is white fucking wine this is a travesty it's christmas not a fucking funeral
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
So random question: what's a good way to tell your brother that his Skype sex kept you awake last night? I'm not really sure how that conversation begins.
Randomize
