Dude, the girl i fucked last night left wearing my high school musical shirt you bought me. she also left her panties here though.
The one with Zac Efrons face on it? You definitely got the short in of the stick. i'd rather have the shirt
fuck. yeah me too. i don't even think these panties would fit me
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
She swung at the pinata with crutches
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
I'm imagining a seal in an ugly shirt hahahahaha Percocet
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
You've changed since you got that strap on
How do you tell a vegan you want him to stuff you like a turkey?
Where you been?
Please tell me this is a booty call
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
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