You just took 4 shots. 2 of them were maple syrup.
Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
I told him he didn't want "flip-flop extraction" on his medical history.
He looked at me and said "Last call" before putting his penis away into his boxers
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
HOLD ONTO YOUR PANTIES AND SAY GOODBYE TO THE REMAINDER OF YOUR INTEGRITY
He tried to get me to go back to his place on the condition that he has 6 cats. I was very tempted but I said no. Hoping to go see the cats tomorrow
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
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